what was it you wanted?

I wish that I could have been
what you wanted me to be
But the truth is I'm not
and that wasn't hard to see

I did everything I could do
to try to make you know
that I truly cared and meant what I said
But you still decided to go

I am so confused
it's like my natural state now
If I could understand
I wouldn't really know how

I think you know what I mean
if you think about it that way
There's not much left to do
And there isn't any more to say

It kills me inside to know
I wasn't loved by you
but that's okay, this life ends soon
and I can escape the pain from it too